Melting a Glacier in the Microwave
Sometimes I like to ask ChatGPT absurd hypothetical questions just for fun.
Today I asked, "How long would it take to melt the world's largest glacier in a standard kitchen microwave by cutting it into individual chunks?"
ChatGPT graced us with its wisdom.
Suppose we cut the Lambert Glacier in Antarctica into 1 kg microwaveable chunks and use an ordinary 1,000-watt microwave. Because the glacier’s true average thickness varies, I’ll use 1 km average thickness for a reasonable back-of-the-envelope estimate.
That gives about 16,000 km³ of ice, or roughly 14.7 quadrillion kg.
Assume the ice starts at −20°C. For every kilogram, you need roughly:
42,000 J to warm it from −20°C to 0°C 334,000 J to actually melt it ≈376,000 joules/kg total
So one 1-kg glacier chunk would take about 6.3 minutes in a perfectly efficient 1,000-W microwave.
Do that 14.7 quadrillion times and you get:
≈ 175 billion years
That assumes the microwave operates continuously, 24/7, at 100% efficiency, every chunk absorbs all the microwave energy, you instantly swap chunks, nothing ever refreezes, and the microwave never breaks.
For comparison, the universe is about 13.8 billion years old.
So you'd be microwaving Lambert Glacier for roughly 13 times the current age of the universe.
So, if you're ever in a situation where you need to melt the Lambert Glacier, you might as well grab a book and get comfy.